Times
by Rockheart456
Summary: Sam didn't like cute stuff. So she developed something that is different from it. Something completely different. But things change over time. What will Sam experience? A little bit AU.


**A/N: I don't own iCarly**

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 **Starting time.**

Sam Puckett didn't like cute stuff.

When she was little, she had a pink, fluffy bunny toy that she despised so much. It was a gift from one of the friends of Melanie. Of course Melanie Puckett-as adorable as she always acts- fawned over the bunnies that were given to the both of them. Sam just happily gave Melanie the toy whenever she borrowed it. She would merely go back to making spitballs to be used during next day's homeroom period. She didn't like what Melanie adored. Besides, she couldn't compete with Melanie when it comes to those kinds of things.

When she was a little over five, she got a gift that for the first time she liked. It was a guitar. This was before her mother turned into some kind of monstrous witch that always left her on her own devices. The guitar was an acoustic, playing such mellifluous sounds every time she strummed it. There was just one problem. In fact, make it two. It was pink and glittered. If there was one thing that she hated most more than pink stuff, it was glittered objects.

"Don't be such a whiner, Sam." her mother always said, grabbing a bottle of beer from their refrigerator. "A guitar is a guitar."

But Sam didn't like the look of the guitar. So she scrubbed the glitter off and painted it black. She didn't care if it looked worse than it did. Her only concern is making it less cute and more cool. Because to her, Melanie already claimed the cute persona. So what was left to take, but a cool one. And despite her mother protesting every step of the way, she made it so that she looked cool starting with the guitar.

 **School times.**

It was a sunny day and she was starving. She hadn't had breakfast since her oh-so-good mother forgot to, still slouched in their couch, drunk off her crazy little mind. She wondered if she should take her usual lunch from the skinny boy that always hanged out near the library. That boy is easily her ticket to a satisfied stomach. But, she was a little far from the library and she was lazy.

Suddenly, out of the corner of her eye, she saw a pretty girl seated in a blue table. The girl wore pink and Sam swore that she could notice a bit of make-up on the girl's perfect face. The pretty girl was already unpacking something out of her bag, and Sam-grabbing the opportunity- dashed towards the girl full speed with her tummy rumbling all the way. When she was near the girl, she snatched the food (a sandwich as it turned out) away from the girl and bumped her out of the table, but when she was about to take a bite, she felt the food being snatched out of her hand while being bumped out of the table herself.

She was surprised to say the least. She hadn't expected someone to challenge her. But when she stood up and saw the look of smugness and confidence on the girl's face, she immediately respected the girl. She didn't know why. She just did.

And that was when she met Carly.

Carly. Oh so perfect Carly. She was the quintessential pretty girl that every school has. She was always fawned over by the guys in school. A dab of make-up would always be on her face with a hint of red lipstick. And while Sam was usually compared to Carly, her best friend, she didn't mind at all. Firstly, she get to punch them in their faces and have an acceptable (for her at least) reason for doing it. Second, she didn't care at all. She was the cool one, not the cute one. Melanie and Carly had that personality. If she will not be fawned over for her beauty then she will at least draw awe for her strength and coolness. Because that was how she differed from the usual girls around her. For Sam, it was what made her so special. Even if it was only herself that acknowledged it.

When Sam asked Carly why she always had make-up, Carly simply answered,

"So that the boys will notice."

And so she vowed to herself then that she would always be the opposite of that. The cool yet aggressive girl that didn't take any crap from anybody. And for some years, it actually made her satisfied with herself. She was satisfied because she was special; satisfied because she was treated differently; satisfied because she was unique; satisfied because she was set apart from Carly and Melanie.

Then he came. Fredward Benson. If Carly was the quintessential pretty girl then Freddie was the quintessential nerd that always seemed to make the school his personal playground, and of course, he would always drool over the pretty girls. It just so happened that Freddie chose Sam's best friend, Carly.

They were now always pitted together, fighting for Carly's attention. Sam, as expected, won most of those fights. Teasing and bullying usually stopped Freddie in his tracks which made Sam happy. He would try and bust a move, but like a professional goalkeeper, she would always swat that attempt away. And along the way, she made it her personal goal to change Freddie's life. To make it one hell of an up and down (but mostly down) ride. Although, she backed away enough to let the poor boy breathe a little easier. She didn't think she can be that cruel.

But there was one thing that Sam didn't expect. Freddie remained even throughout her beatings and teasings. Also, he began to fight back. Their usual banter usually ended up with Sam grinning smugly as she pinned down Freddie while mocking him. Now, he fought back. Sam admits that along the years, he had picked up a few good comebacks. He also began to get stronger. The nerd that Sam always took him for was now just a part of him. While his other half was replaced by something a whole lot stranger.

But there was still one thing that didn't change. His affection for Carly. And somehow, this began to bother her a bit more and more as the days and months passed by.

And that was when Sam began to feel a bit different herself. She began to stare at herself in the mirror for longer times now, turning right and left to see every side of her body with questions she didn't like buzzing around in her head like some flies.

Is that fine? Do I look good? Is this too much?

And while she hated it, she couldn't help but ask herself,

"Do I look cute in this?"

 **Confusing times.**

She began to wear clothes that she swore she would never wear. She wore blouses and sometimes skirts in her everyday routine. She would ask Carly to put some make-up on her face with Carly giddily agreeing. Soon, she began to attract other boys. Some brave souls actually stepped up and asked her out, but she just flat out rejected them, all the while looking at only one person. That one person that she didn't even expect to hold good intentions to let alone wild emotions.

Him. Fredward.

She began to ease up on the beatings, settling for a talk, and even though their talk was awkward, she preferred it because it made her a bit closer to him. At least that what she thinks she feels. And to her delight and happiness, it got better every day. At some point, they were able to go one full day without arguing, instead, they just talked about things that presented themselves out of the blue.

And while Sam couldn't help but feel that little something, she also got angry and mad. All of what she built upon in her younger years were now being swept away by some unseen current brought about by this abrupt change. Her aggressive reputation was now fading, being replaced by a reputation she swore she would never imitate. A reputation for being a girly pretty lass. And she hated it, but she also couldn't help it.

She did it all just to attract him.

Then it all came crashing down.

Tired of becoming second rate to the likes of Carly and Melanie, she puffed her chest and looked for Freddie. After a few beating seconds, she finally found him, but what she saw gave her a thorn in her chest. For with Freddie was girl. A girly pretty lass that wore pink clothing and had make-up. A girl with glitters on some parts of her arms and wrists. Her best friend, Carly Shay. And they were joined by an embrace and at the looks of it, neither are eager to let go.

Sam did all she could to maintain her composure. After sneaking out of Carly's apartment, she ran towards her house, struggling not to let a single tear run down her face. When she reached her house, she slammed the door close and dashed to her room, plopping down in her bed in one big crash. Still, she didn't cry. Instead, she gathered up all the things she felt and let out one big frustrated scream.

She tore off all the pretty clothing that she was wearing and threw them at the corners of the room. She went to the bathroom in her room and placed her head under a tap of running water, scrubbing her face roughly as she did her best to get rid of all the make-up in her face which now felt like mud in her face. After that, she ruffled through her closet and wore some jeans and t-shirt. It looked like that she was right all along. Being cute and pretty was a waste of her time. She was right to hate it, but she was blinded by some infatuation that just made her weak and vulnerable.

So the next day, she marched towards the hotel room of Carly. When she opened the door, she immediately saw Carly and Freddie talking. When they both heard the door open, Carly and Freddie turned around, and Sam saw that Freddie was holding a red rose, its green stem free of the thorns that are naturally placed in its points.

Freddie was smiling while Carly was trying to cover her mouth, her expression showing one of concealed (hardly) delight, but Sam's face was anything but. She scowled at both of them, and still not able to let go of what she witnessed and unable to control her fury, she lashed out at Freddie. All her disappointments and anger was aimed towards Freddie. She punched and kicked him everywhere while Carly was screaming herself hoarse.

"Sam! What are you doing? Get off of him!"

Freddie wasn't saying anything. He was just curled into a ball in the floor, trying to shield himself as Sam continued her the punches and kicks.

Sam couldn't take it anymore. All the things that she built up for herself were now gone. Cute and pretty didn't go so well as she tried. She knew better, but she didn't follow. And it was all his fault. All his!

After a while, Sam stopped, heavily panting while looking at Freddie, who had sustained a bruised lip and a bloody nose. Sam looked right beside him and saw the rose all stepped on and flattened.

"What did you do that for, Sam? You just beat up, Freddie!" Carly shrieked, trying to help Freddie stand.

Sam tried to reply, but she was still out of breath. Freddie was now looking at Sam, all hurt and bruised. But Sam saw that for some reason, the pain wasn't just physical. Sam began to feel an urge to just collapse down to the ground and cry. But she didn't want to do that. Carly was glaring at her in a manner that she didn't think Carly can do, her eyes burning with some kind of confused fury.

And so that was when Sam, for the first time in her life, ran away from her problem. She ran out the front door and into the streets of Seattle. She kept on running until she wasn't able to run anymore. She stopped at an alleyway near some smoothie shop. As she struggled to catch her breath, she took her seat in one of the tables set out in the shop.

She then thought about her messy life. How it all became to go downhill. She knew. She knew that going pretty wasn't the way to go, yet she did it. Why? Why? Why!

That was when she cried. For the first time that she remembered, tears began to run down her face. She wiped them off immediately with her wrists, but it still kept on coming. Her sight became a blur, partially covered by the thick tears that were now rushing out of her like tap water. She didn't care if somebody saw her since it was already futile. She gave up her "cool" reputation when she decided to go pretty. Let them look and stare at the perfect example of a fool.

After a while of letting out all her heavy emotions, the waterworks stopped, to which she is grateful for. She hiccuped and breathed heavily as she tried to compose herself. It was then that she heard a few footsteps coming her way. She looked up and saw something she didn't expect.

It was Freddie.

He was looking at her with some reluctance, as if thinking whether he should even bother. And he was holding something red in his hand with some kind of green rod hanging below it. As Sam wiped of the tears from her eyes, she saw that it was still the red rose that he bought awhile ago, all flattened out.

"May I sit down, Sam?"

Sam contemplated this for a minute before nodding her head. Freddie then slid on a seat across Sam, his chair squeaking in the process. Both of them stayed silent for awhile, unaware of what to say next. Finally, Freddie spoke up.

"Do you mind telling me what all of that was about, Sam?" Freddie asked, breaking the silence. "You don't usually beat me up that hard. It usually stops after a one-two punch."

He chuckled faintly while Sam just stayed silent. He cleared his throat and asked,

"Sam?"

It was when Sam decided to lay it all at the table. There was nothing she could lose anymore.

It was then that Sam spilled everything that she felt. All the desire to be able to be unique from the girls (especially pretty ones), to be distinct from others by coming up with an aggressive and cool (rather tomboyish) personality, and her anguish in everything when it comes to girly stuff.

Freddie stayed silent throughout, listening intently. And when Sam paused for a moment to gather her thoughts, he asked a question,

"Then why did you change?" he asked in a soft manner.

Sam inhaled deeply before answering that it was all because of him. It was because of him that she decided to let go of her old ways and embrace something that she so despised. It was all to get his attention. His love. But she said it was all for nothing in the end, since she-as she had expected- didn't compare to the likes of real pretty girls like Carly and Melanie.

Sam didn't feel anything throughout the course of her explanation. In fact, she felt hollow inside of her, but she figured that it was better than feel some throbbing pain.

At the end of explanation, Freddie simply gave a soft smile. This made Sam feel lower than what she was feeling. She should've known that this was all some kind of attempt to get back at her for all the bullying that she had done to him. And maybe she had deserved it, but it doesn't make it hurt any less.

Freddie then finally showed her the rose that he has been holding.

"Do you see this rose, Sam?"

Sam made no attempt to speak or make any movement whatsoever; Freddie took this as a sign to continue.

"I bought this rose for someone. Yet, she is not someone that you expect me to give it to." Freddie said. Sam was confused at this, but before she can ask, Freddie continued. "It was for you, Sam."

Sam wasn't sure whether she had heard him correctly. Was that really what he said?

"It's for you, Sam." he repeated, looking at the rose. "You see, it represents everything about you. Yes, I know that I said that I liked Carly. And I still do now, not just the same way. Now, I see her more as a sister rather than something first time we bantered, I felt some contempt for you, I won't deny that. But as the days wore on, I actually grew used to it. I figured that it was a way for us to communicate. And during that phase, I find myself becoming more curious about you. I wanted to know more about you. And somehow, we went to that phase where we just talked. And that's what I liked the most. But with it came something that I found myself disliking."

Freddie paused for a moment and looked at Sam. Sam was just listening to what he said. All of these were beginning to overwhelm her, but she could feel that hollowness inside her fade a bit as it is being replaced by something more. Something warm.

"You developed a pretty girl persona. And it was so unlike you. You had these blouses and skirts that were not 'you'. I do like your look in those, don't get me wrong, but it showed a personality that you didn't have. A personality that didn't show your true self. A personality that wasn't what I loved and liked. It was right for you to set yourself apart from other people. Although you can get a too aggressive at times, I know that you can be sweet in your own way. Like this rose, which is beautiful in its own way despite it having quite a number of thorns."

There was some silence again, this time both parties were trying to think of what to do next. Freddie, determined to follow up on what he is saying, stood up and offered the rose to Sam.

"So, do you want to be my girlfriend?"

Sam felt warmth spread through her like some form of emotional wildfire. She couldn't help, but smile widely at Freddie. All her anguish had been washed away by what he had said. He explained to her of his intentions and reasons and she thinks that it's enough. In fact, it was more than enough. Her morose feeling was replaced by some unmatched happiness that made her feel like she is flying.

And so, she said yes to his proposal, but she said that she would be the one leading the relationship to which Freddie just rolled his eyes. Freddie took her hand in his and Sam just let it happen. She didn't need to do anything more. Freddie said that they should now go back to Carly who was waiting for him to come back with Sam; Sam simply nodded, and both of them walked towards Carly's building.

 **Upcoming better times.**

Now, Sam still has some dislike towards all things cute. But, Freddie said that she doesn't have to be. He said that she doesn't have to be cute. He likes her just the way she is. Of course, as a way of showing her love to him, she makes herself a little (and she literally means _just_ a little) cuter and prettier every now and then for him but that's just occasionally and up to her. And for that, she is forever grateful.

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 **A/N: Just** **made a little story to keep my writing in check. Hope you guys liked it. Leaving a review is very much appreciated. Peace!**


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